Traveling with little ones is tough. It doesn’t matter how prepared you are, literally or mentally, a toddler or baby will always bring the element of unpredictability. We’re currently just shy of three weeks into our 4 week vacation, and although everything is going relatively smoothly, every time I seem to let my guard down, chaos ensues. Isabelle seems to have an accurate radar for when I’m starting to feel comfortable and confident.. and every time, she has a meltdown to even me out and keep me on my toes. It’s absolutely infuriating. We knew this “vacation” would not be a leisurely one, or relaxing in the slightest.. but I didn’t think my anxiety would be this revved up. Don’t get me wrong, the good has outweighed the not so good, and I would and will (possibly regretfully) do this again, but the tension I feel some days waiting for the shoe to drop is definitely present. We traveled from San Gimignano, Italy to Lucca yesterday with a bus ride, two train rides, and a 40 minute trek through town. It was a long day to say the least, leaving one airbnb at 10am to arrive at our other at 330pm. If you’re new here, we have a 9 month old and a 2.5 year old. So it felt extra long to them, I’m sure. They actually did great though! That is, until my husband and I started discussing how they killed it and how lucky we were.. then, like clockwork, Izzy erupted with a gigantic meltdown. The best part was we were already in Lucca when she melted down. We literally had just gotten off the train and stepped into the elevator at the train station when she screamed the most horrific blood curdling scream ever. We legit thought the elevator door had ripped her little arm off and started to freak out ourselves. Both of us, wearing double backpacks, front and back (except my front was a 9 month old in a carrier), a stroller with a big ole diaper bag attached, a suitcase, and the frantic 2.5 year old were crammed into a shoebox elevator with zero room panicking and yelling and trying to figure out what the ef was going on. But don’t worry, her arm was fine.. we just forgot to let her push the elevator button. wtf. The meltdown did last awhile.. it mostly carried on during our 40 minute trek through town.. but it was a pretty big mistake on our end so who could blame her. Totally kidding.. toddlers are the worst. But it was a long day, she was totally out of routine, we were traveling through lunchtime and nap time and it was just too much for our little one. Definitely wasn’t fair, so even though she was a bit dramatic, it was totally understood.

Although it’s not always the perfect execution (is it ever with children?), we try to do a few things differently on travel days to make it easier on all of us. It mostly comes down to throwing expectations, limitations, and any kind of schedule out the window. And sometimes, no matter how hard you try and prepare, you fall short anyway. You just have to go with it.. put your head down, grit your teeth, and just keep moving forward.

Snacks

The biggest thing that always works for us is snacks. On a typical day we try to do healthier options and will limit quantity as to not impact their next meal. Travel days are different. You want 487 cheese poofs? You got it. Not our finest snack time, but those cheese poofs are currently acting as comfort food and their little world is upside down right now so.. choose your battles. Both our little ones feel much better with a snack in hand and that’s enough for us. We’ll even it out when we get where we’re going.

Screen Time

Another cringe. We bought our toddler headphones for this trip and I’m still side eyeing myself about it. That said, it’s been amazing having her content with her show on. She knows the headphones only come out on travel days and that adds to the novelty. It’s unlimited screen time when we’re dealing with planes, trains, and automobiles and she totally knows it. It gives her a sense of responsibility too since we tell her she’s in charge of making sure she has her own headphones with her at all times.

Stimulation

Such a no brainer, but easy to forget. Something new and different is always engaging. Even if it’s only for 5 minutes. Before our trip, I had packed Isabelle a big activity folder and didn’t let her see it until we boarded our flight. It had three small puzzles, a coloring book and crayons, stickers, etc. Separately, I stashed different stickers, action figures she had never seen, and coloring pads with the invisible marker (no mess!) Eventually we were circling back on activities and coloring pads, but the new aspect lasted well through our first week. I clearly held onto the goods as long as I could. Our current go to is “I spy” though and it’s quite effective.

Break up the Day

Pit stops, lunch breaks, transfers.. anything to break up the day and get them standing or walking. Not only can they stretch a bit and move their body, but the stop/change of scenery creates a bit of stimulation as well. A direct train or bus always sounds like the best option, but if you’re stuck on that form of transportation for an extended period, it could feel never-ending. We’ll always stay longer on a train since you can move around a bit and there’s usually a bathroom. A bus however, consider your options. Our bus ride yesterday was 20 minutes to Poggibonsi train station from San Gimignano.. it was short enough that neither kid was phased and I don’t think Izzy even had her headphones on. From there, we had two 1.5 hour train rides with a transfer in Florence. The transfer was short, but it at least got them off the train.

Sounds

Some people swear by using a sound machine on the go and I think it can really be a great tool. We’ve used ours on our stroller for our 9 month old, but not so much elsewhere. I’m very apprehensive to intrude on other people’s peace and space.. so I tend to stick to the less offensive and usually more tedious way of dealing with things. Bouncing and shushing is my go to unless our little became inconsolable.. then I think people would vote for a sound machine lol.

Timing

Obviously you are the only know who knows how to navigate this one, but it’s an important one to remember. Depending how we’re traveling that day will dictate when we’re heading out and if we’re squeezing in a nap beforehand or matching up our start time with naptime. Maggie will sleep in her carseat, but not so much in the carrier or our laps.. so if we’re planning a roadtrip, we usually plan to leave right at nap time so Mags will sleep during the ride. For trains and buses, we’ve been trying to squeeze in a nap before heading out. Even if we have to cut her nap short, we know she’ll be loads happier with having had a little rest beforehand.

The best way to totally prepare for a travel day though is to just lower your expectations. It’s going to be what it’s going to be and either way, you’re doing it and you deserve a pat on the back. It’s not easy and you already knew that when you decided to do it. So keep killing it and offering cheese poofs.